Spoilers: it’s not what you’re wearing
You all know the benefit of making a first good impression. But let’s back-seat all we know about dressing nicely and hanging a smile on your face. The true secret to building a lasting connection is more profound than what you wear.
According to research, there are two basic questions that we ask (consciously or subconsciously) about a person we meet for the first time.
Can I trust this person?
And can I respect this person?
Both questions help you measure a person’s warmth and competence, respectively. you should put gaining your peers’ trust over winning their respect—even in a workplace setting. “If someone you’re trying to influence doesn’t trust you, you’re not going to get very far.
A warm, trustworthy person who is also strong elicits admiration, but only after you’ve established trust does your strength become a gift rather than a threat.
The crucial point: The next time you meet someone new, focus on gaining their trust—not winning them over with a firm handshake.